Self Love journey

Cerebral Palsy, disabled blogger, self love

Hello everyone,

It has been a while since I’ve posted anything as I have been busy and done alot of thinking, I am going to discuss about self love.

I’ve always struggled to believe in myself ever since I remember, when I was growing up I went through a lot of abuse, even my mother would put me down quite often for being a big girl and having other issues.

Recently I’m trying to Self Love as I always put everyone else before myself as I like to please people and try my hardest to make them happy. I need to learn I never be a size 8 no matter what how many diets I go, seeing plus size models boosts my confidence and not feeling alone knowing we all come different sizes.

It was a pleasure meeting one of my inspirations Tess Holliday  last month, seeing her makes me accept the fact you don’t need to be a size 8 to be happy and everyone can wear whatever their want even be naked if they wanted.

It was actually one of the best days of my life meeting people who are different sizes, I didn’t want the day to end.

I’m on a journey to put myself first, focus on my dreams and learn to think positive more often. I go to a support group for survivors every fortnight until February. Hopefully I’ll be a stronger, happier and confident person in next 5 months.

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If people can’t accept and love for who you are, they don’t belong in your life for a reason.

I hope you like my posts, if you do please follow for me, I will appreciate it and will mean alot to me.

 

With Love,you_doodle_2017-05-16t20_15_31z

Why I want to lose weight?

Cerebral Palsy, Uncategorized

Hello everyone,

It has been a good few weeks the last time I wrote a blog post. Well I can say I’ve been busy playing on my PS4 especially on grand theft auto and just dance (helping me to get exercise in my life).

Normally I would do my blog posts on my IPad, somehow it got robbed as UK had a really hot day 3 weeks ago and I was out for the day but I forgot I’ve left my bedroom window opened too also my old laptop got stolen too, I had to buy a new one which I’m lucky I got the money to get one.

Anyways I don’t want to bore you as I’m meant to tell why I want to lose weight. Well I always had a weight problem even when I was a kid. I love food too much, who doesn’t? To be honest I’ve been trying to keep it off for last 2 and half years since I’ve got diagnosed with diabetes type 2 as it runs in my mothers side of family,  I don’t need metformin to control it since march 2016 as I done my best to change my eating habits also I have to go for a every 6 months blood test to check hows everything.

Well it has been a struggle to keep it off as last year I had really bad depression as I put weight back on,  been trying to stick on diet since mid January this year. It has been like a rollercoaster but I’m so determined to lose more weight as I’m going away to Benidorm in November which I want to be a UK size 14. I’m nearly getting back to a UK size 16, that where I was a year ago.

Right now I’m trying to control my calories and do exercises like doing just dance and going swimming also sometimes push around a bit my manual chair, that’s why I got a fitbit so I can track my calories.

Really want to able love my body and accept the fact I’m not a size 8 but I will have some chubbiness on my body as my goal is to be a UK size 12-14.

One day there will be somebody will accept me for who I am, I just need to focus on myself at the moment.

With love,you_doodle_2017-05-16t20_15_31z

 

Manchester Attack 

Uncategorized

Hello everyone,

I really needed to talk about this as UK had one of the worst massacre in history especially it happened in Manchester as I live 20 minutes away. All the young people who went to see their idol Ariana grande on Monday night it should have been one of their best nights of their life.

It has took 22 young innocent lives away when they had their life ahead of them , it’s upsetting knowing they should have gone home to their families safely and talking about how much they enjoyed the night. It’s heartbreaking knowing somebody would want to kill young victims for anger when they done nothing wrong.

Seriously there so much hate in the world it’s unreal I do wish there was peace, no wars and no revenge. Power causes problems.

As 2017 the world should be amazing place to  live but there so much hate and evilness especially it has been going on for 1000s & 1000s years
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R.I.P to the young people have lost their lives in a horrible attack

Also hope the ones are injuried will recover.

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It was amazing to see people from the UK and greater Manchester actually helped and support everyone

I can say I’m proud to be from greater Manchester even thought it can be a shithole at times but it’s our home end of the day ❤️🇬🇧🙏
With love,

Mental Health 

Cerebral Palsy, Uncategorized

Hello everyone, 

I’m going to talk about mental health as I suffer with depression, I was going to talk about it last week but I was having a up and down week.

I’ve suffer depression ever since I’ve remember that when I was a 12 year old, I remember when I started to feel worthless, unwanted and not wanted to be alive. I struggled with high school as I was getting picked on for the way I look, the weight, my disability and the way I am also I had many issues at home nobody knew what was going on as I couldn’t escape from my problems.

The only thing would help me escape from reality is listening to MUSIC.

No child or teenager shouldn’t have to go through many issues especially abuse when it should have been a good childhood.

I would speak to other teenagers online especially on website makers or YouTube even people I’ve met on holidays I could able to myself on msn messenger and cheer me up.

At 15 i started to self harm when I did it at the time it felt good to ease the pain I was feeling at the time. I would cover it all p wearing jackets and long sleeve tops so nobody noticed it. I’ve struggled on and off for self harming for good 8 years I haven’t thought of self harming for good 6 months.

Last year I was in a bad place as I thought about my past, worthless, ugly. I felt everything would be okay when I got in touch with my dad this time last year, but weeks into getting to know my dad everything hit me like a tonne of bricks, what  I went through which I though I deserved at the time.

I end up having counselling last October which it was as I had 12 sessions also the counsellor was amazing able to help me think differently. I will admit I did struggle at first 6 weeks as I would burst into tears when I had to talk about everything but it got easier towards to end as I accepted I didn’t deserve the abuse.

Now I can handle things better and let go of my past as I know it wasn’t my fault. I’m in a better place having my dad, Nan and good friends to be there for me when I need them. I do have my good, bad and ugly days but I know some people don’t agree with antidepressants but it really has helped me as I’m on 100mg sertraline a day. I’ll admit I will scared to go off them incase I go back in a bad place again even though I’m in a better place.

One day I’ll love to help vulnerable young people and disabilities who don’t have it easy abs need somebody to talk to, I want to be a youth worker, counsellor or mentor.

With love,

You_Doodle_2017-05-16T20_15_31Z

First Time❤️

Cerebral Palsy, Uncategorized

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Hello everyone,

I am Rochelle, you may know me from instagram @rochelleonwheelsss. Well I decided to make a blog because I like to write stuff especially on my disability as I got so cerebral palsy spastic dipegla partiality deaf, mild learning difficulty also I do have speech problems as sometimes I struggle to pronounce words.

 I may discuss on my weightloss journey as I’ve been trying to lose weight for a while  as I’m trying to control my diabetes type 2, as it runs in my family which can be rubbish at times.

I will talk about my mental health as I’ve struggled with my depression since I was 12 I didn’t have a easy upbringing from a 8 year old. It’s like being on a rollercoaster when you have depression you have your good and bad days with it, I do my hardest to stay positive especially I’ve got good support around me 😊

I may add random quotes as I enjoy seeing quotes that we all can relate to, some pictures of me and the people I adore making memories ❤️ I am a independent girl trying to live my young life with a blast 👸

I really appreciate it if you do enjoy my posts

with love,

Rochelle x